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Better Living Through Chemistry
Dec. 8th, 2005 07:36 pmI was in a snarly, crabby mood for much of today. It wasn't stress, exactly--I had a lot to do, but it was no worse than any other Thursday. Little things that I usually take in stride were irritating the living fuck out of me, (my co-worker singing Christmas carols, for example) and my overall mood seemed to be mired in an unshakable funk. I tried breathing, I tried stretching, nothing seemed to take.
Then I remembered. I'd neglected to take my meds last night, since we'd gone straight to Melton's after doing our Catholic routine for The Feast of the Immaculate Conception (or, as I like to call it, The Feast of the Perpetual Misconception, since I have to keep explaining to non-Catholics that it's not Jesus' conception we're talking about, but Mary's.) I usually take my meds after dinner, but going out to eat throws off my routine.
So one day without my Paxil and Zyprexa and I'm thrown back into suck city. I hate this. I hate the fact that my moods are so dependent on these fucking chemicals. I hate the way everything gets tinted like a dirty window and all I can see is what's wrong.
I went to the gym and lifted heavy things for a while, and that seemed to help. So did dinner and a shower. And remembering to take my meds this time.
Today I took pleasure in a hot shower.
Today I learned that I managed to earn $1.95 in overtime this paycheck.
Then I remembered. I'd neglected to take my meds last night, since we'd gone straight to Melton's after doing our Catholic routine for The Feast of the Immaculate Conception (or, as I like to call it, The Feast of the Perpetual Misconception, since I have to keep explaining to non-Catholics that it's not Jesus' conception we're talking about, but Mary's.) I usually take my meds after dinner, but going out to eat throws off my routine.
So one day without my Paxil and Zyprexa and I'm thrown back into suck city. I hate this. I hate the fact that my moods are so dependent on these fucking chemicals. I hate the way everything gets tinted like a dirty window and all I can see is what's wrong.
I went to the gym and lifted heavy things for a while, and that seemed to help. So did dinner and a shower. And remembering to take my meds this time.
Today I took pleasure in a hot shower.
Today I learned that I managed to earn $1.95 in overtime this paycheck.
